DAY TWO:

The morning begins with such sunny sun shine its bright ray of lights from my room window. I didn’t see myself fall asleep, maybe I’ve cried through the night till I was finally asleep. The best gift of strength came such a shock... my Uncle he finally made it here. Just as you could guess... he sat on the chair thru the night holding my hand as I lay in slumber.

I was preparing for My OP today... still no sign of my Mother here. Only my Stepfather faithfully came to visit me in the morning. I suppose from where I stood in this room, it doesn’t take long for them both to realise how disappointed I was when my Mother refuse to come.

This moment before I step into the Operation theatre... My Dad said something to me that cause a little hesitation to my decision. “You don’t have to force yourself to do this if you don’t want to. I wouldn’t blame you or hate you if you change your mind. All I want is for you to be happy.”

Still I clenched my hands and smile at him... I don’t understand why I did so. But at that point of time, I was a little happy that his concern was not for the operation to run smoothly but mostly about my happiness. Dear God, if you are hearing my prayers... grant me the strength to pull thru these obstacles and give me enough courage to make a decision that would entrust everyone I care for a glimpse of happiness even if that picture would not include me.

When I was awake around 7pm, the room was so silent only the table light was left on to brighten the room. Guess who was there waiting for me... It was only my dad. Even so it still fills my heart with ½ cup of happiness to know that I was not alone...

Another day will soon leave us,
It would leave us feeling another pain would come.
Even when it’s difficult to hide,
We still choose to pretend that we are strong.
Another day would come,
Still no changes done to amend the problem...
Someone will regret, while another would cry,
There’s so much to say in such little time,
So much to do, so hard to get it started.
When another day is gone...
I would be leaving, so would you.
I would regret this, and I would also be the one who would lose everything.