my heart...

My heart…

Hear my last words…
I wished I had treated you better.
For all those pain and hurtful things I did…
I’m sorry….

It’s not that I don’t love, but for love…
I hurt and got hurt at the same time as I left you hanging on.
I wouldn’t ask to be forgiven or forgiveness,
Only a chance to say goodbye would be enough.

I wounded your pride, broke your heart and made you cry.
If only I had extra time,
I swear I fixed it for you before I leave.
I lied when I say that your love was not enough,
And that I feel suffocated by your presence…
Back then I said it because I wanted to force your love out of me…

All this time… I kept asking myself…
How do I tell you that I was dying. My days are limited.
And that I was afraid of not being with you.
I can’t imagine you pain for me in death.
So I got scared, I rather hurt my own heart and force out your love,
And make you leave me.

I prayed that god would be kind enough,
To give me strength and turn my heart cold enough,
So I could hurt you and watch you leave as I faced with your tears…
I even asked Him for a chance to let me continue to love you,
Till my very last breath…

I hurt you and watched my own heart break…
So love please leave, you deserved better.

Although, I broke us up, never once I regretted it.
In those days I was left hanging, deep inside I knew God hear my prayers,
To grant you someone worthy to love you, When I couldn’t.
You found love again while getting hurt.
I couldn’t thank her enough for all the things she did for you.
I’m happy knowing your life was better without me…

Someday if this truth should reveal its identity,
Don’t feel bad about what you did to me, or
How I made it through days crying silently missing you.
It was not your fault that things ended this way…
It was all mine…

While in pain and suffering,
It was thoughts of you that and everything about you,
That keeps me going through my medical sessions.
My memories of you was my source of strength.

Promise me!
You’ll never cry for our love that is already gone.
Just hold on to her and live with happiness for my sake.

I’m sorry that I’m dying,
I’m sorry for leaving you like this.
My heart would remember you…
Your love that you’ve given me was enough to last a lifetime.
I’m blessed and thankful to have met you.

So don’t feel bad for me.
I’m sure I had live to the fullest because of you.
So here is my final goodbyes….
Goodbye my heart…
Goodbye my love…