Pain in reality....

To live this way for a lifetime...

Do you know what it feels like?
Trying to hold on to something that you should never touch?
Something that keep your entire life together even though in reality…
It’s something that does not belong to you…
In the face of the world…
It’s something worth protecting even though you are often left hurt by it’s presence…
You can struggle to give and only give to fit in…
But like a missing piece of puzzle, you can never fit into a new set…
So you are always left alone to fend for your life at hand…

When the moment comes for you to really step behind the situation…
It’s only smart to choose a path that is called sacrifice.
The part you decide to give up after a long period of suffering and torturing…
May seem easy but honestly it’s the hardest pain and guilt one heart could bear.
It’s never easy, when you are always blamed. But in this picture…
It all started because of you…
You hurt them!
So it’s only right that the slap you got, was meant for you…

Look at what you’ve done…
How could you destroy something you tried so hard to protect?
How much more pain can you inflict on their lives..
How can you not spare their future?
How dare you hurt them that way and expect to be forgiven!
You should stop now… Walk out if you must..
If that is the only thing you can do to bring back what was lost…
Don’t regret this moment, ever in your life.

In the process of letting go…
The time you spent watching from a distance don’t shorten.
It’s like living in a parallel line that when you continue to draw…
The distance gets longer with time, but will never meet…
You struggle as you missed its existence… You pained and suffer in silence…
You never could be honest when you try to lie about your emotion…
That when facing them your wall around you just collapse to the ground…

People don’t see you as lonely… So even as you cried so hard inside they don’t know…
In rainy days that’s when you cried your hardest..
Standing behind the wall like a stalker watching them through the window…
Trying to live in the shadow of their happiness…
If that is what you called sacrifice is… then it is worth every bit of your sufferings…
Only God knows how you tried to make it through everyday as an unforgiven sinner.