It's not your fault.. So don't be ashamed

Don’t be ashamed

It’s not your fault that your life met a tragedy.

It’s not your fault that you believed the lies reality had whispered to you.

It’s not your fault that you hurt people so easily.

It not your fault that you never knew happiness all your life

It’s not your fault that nightmares are your best memories.

Don’t be ashamed, of what you are.

Don’t be afraid to hide because you’re scared.

Don’t just live in silent, cry if you must so there will be no regrets after.

They don’t know what you’ve been through,

Yet they try to judge you for all the shortcomings you have.

If they understood the cruelty that you suffer,

They’ll learn to shut their mouth and cried with you.

It’s not your fault that you were not loved.

It’s not your fault that you only knew what anger and pain is.

It’s not your fault that you were alone all this while.

It’s not your fault that you couldn’t cry after this.

It’s not your fault that life is being hard on you.

Don’t be ashamed, of what you are.

It’s fine to show the world what you feel after hiding for so long,

You were so young yet people couldn’t tell the difference,

They should be embarrassed when being compared to you.

What do they actually know?

You had a tough life, yet after every fall you still tried to stand strong,

You have every reason to seek happiness, don’t be ashamed of it.

Like someone once told me,

“If you can’t have the happiness given by God,

It’s not wrong to run and snatch your share from HIM”.

That kid

I didnt see it in her eyes anymore,
The kid that misses her unknown family,
The kid with the most gentle heart I knew,
The one that still cries for every touching movie scenes.
The kid whom words might sound nasty,
But her intention was always for the benefit of others.
The kid whose laughters and smile warms the earth.
That kid is no longer the same I recalled.
What I saw now is a child, struggling and broken...
Whose heart became so cold and numb.
To the point that I never could reach the depth of her heart.
The child whom reflection seem tortured,
I knew what made her change so drastically,
And I'm sorry I couldn't help to make things better for her,
So I wouldn't ask anything of that day.

While others are blinded my her silliness and smiles,
Underneath I saw a mask,
That hid all the painful truth about her heart.
I could hear her cries in her laughters.
I could see tears dripping behind her smiles.
I swear I felt her pain in her warmth,
And in her silence I literally understood her heart well.
Which was so broken and empty.
How can people broke such gentle heart?
Not caring or sparing time to let it heal.
In those eyes I saw how she must have begged,
And yet the one thing that hurt her was the people she trusted.
I ever could imagine how she tried to stay this positive and not cry,
All she did was take the blame and then punish herself like an idiot.

Honestly I worried for her...
The fact that she refuse to cry and talk about it,
I'm scared someday she might do something stupid,
And regret so much more...
I wanted to help her,
But I realised that in that pain that she tried to hide behind,
Is a room of four wall that she prisoned her heart in,
Slowly poisoning her desire to seek happiness that was truly hers.
That's why I say... How could someone broke such gentle heart.